Positivity in the Bathroom

I had an unexpected surprise in an Amsterdam bathroom. While waiting for a table in a small, popular pancake restaurant in the trendy Jordaan section of Amsterdam, I visited their bathroom.

Filling every square inch of wall space above the toilet, were bright red, orange, aqua and lime green messages affirming the restaurant for their extraordinary pancakes. Can you imagine positive bathroom graffiti? I’d never seen it before! The owners of the restaurant had cleverly placed a cube of brightly colored Post-it-sized notes, a pen and some tacks on the ledge above the toilet for patrons to spread the good word—and that they did! Every single note (no exaggeration) was positive!

I left the bathroom with my spirits uplifted. I noticed that expressed positive feelings about the food attracted more of the same. The TED Talk slogan, “Now that’s an idea worth spreading,” flooded my mind. Verbal affirmations are powerful, but the written word is even more so. Each time we reread it we bathe our thoughts and feelings in its positivity.  I imagined the impact of genuinely written positive messages in many different settings.

What If…

• Schools had a positive graffiti bulletin board where kids could post brightly colored Post-it notes about their peers’ acts of kindness or positive role-modeling.

• School bathrooms were decorated with student-made positive affirmations.

• Hospital rooms had a bulletin board (within the patient’s easy view) where nurses posted messages about the good news in a patient’s recovery. A place where family would be encouraged to write the patient’s positive traits and how loved they are as a reminder to staff that this is a human being—do handle with care!

• Employees and employers took the time to write affirming notes to their fellow workers or staff when they appreciated or admired something in someone else’s personhood or performance.

• Graffiti artists were hired to draw beautiful scenes with positive inspiring messages in neglected neighborhoods that need a boost. And while they’re at it, have them paint positive messages and images over the destructive graffiti.

Your Takeaway

 Why Not begin spreading positive messages of your own? Whether posting them in a public place to have a larger ripple effect, or just taking the time to write a positive note to… your friend, child, spouse, parent, sibling, co-worker, doctor, coach, teacher, plumber, gardener, postperson, niece, nephew, store clerk… anyone and everyone you appreciate and who could benefit from your heartfelt words.

Why not begin writing your own positive graffiti today?

We Can Learn a Thing or Two From American Idol

We Can Learn a Thing or Two From American Idol Judges

I was never a fan of American Idol until the 2019 season. During the finals, I was mesmerized as I witnessed Katie Perry’s magnetic eyehold on the contestant, Alejandro. In her sequined dress in all the colors of the rainbow, adorned with big gold disc earnings nearly touching her shoulders, she said, “Homie, everyone was truly listening to you—you could hear a pin drop. It’s such a pleasure to be in the same lifetime as you. You bring original music and artistry.”

 Then Lionel Richie leaning forward in his black sequined jacket added, “Love at first sound. Every now and then someone comes along who captivates your soul. From one song writer to another, happy to have you join the ranks.”

Finally the third judge, Luke Bryant, dressed in his usual casual and scruffy face said, “You play your music your way and when you’re on the cover of Rolling Stone, I’ll buy it.”

Did you notice as I did, something unusual about their feedback?

They were extremely encouraging. Their words to Alejandro and every other contestant said in essence, I see you. You have real talent. Win or lose you have a future in music. They justifiably supported each contestant’s faith in themselves and their hope to break into the music industry.

We Can Encourage Like American Idol Judges

All of us need encouragement, often on a daily basis. Whether we’re weathering a struggle or striving to achieve a goal, (as the contestants were), encouraging words can strengthen our belief in ourselves that we can get through this; we can reach our dream.

Here are some ways we can encourage others:

• Focus on the person’s strengths, in essence you’re saying “You have what it takes.” (Katie described Alejandro’s music as original with great artistry, confirming he had what it takes for his career to take off.)

•   Remind your person of his past successes, in essence saying, “You’ve done it before, you have it in you to do it again.”

•   Share your person’s vision for the future. Encourage him to describe his dream in detail and let him know, “I can see you doing this.” (Luke Bryant expanded Alejandro’s vision imaging him on the cover of Rolling Stone.)

Your Takeaway

Why not be an encourager like the American Idol Judges? All of us are not that different than the contestants. Everyday we strive to work through challenges and achieve small and big dreams. Whether we’re trying to overcome stage fright, connect with an audience and sing our heart out, or attempting to resolve a conflict—everyone needs the support of encouraging words.

Why not begin encouraging today?

Why Not?

Why Not?

My dad, who had always been so proud, admirable, and self-sufficient, lay curled on his side in a light blue pajama top and bottoms, his hospital bed slightly elevated.

His white hair stuck up in a mohawk, his skin pasty white.

His eyes were closed and his breathing heavy. He had eaten two bites of his cheese sandwich at lunch and his tray was barely touched.

How was it possible that my brilliant, always intellectually curious dad, resembled a sick little boy and I was now his mama wanting to do anything to make him comfortable and well.

“Dad, Dad, wake up,” I said gently shaking his arm.

“Oh, Gail, you’re here. Where am I?”

“Dad, we’re in the nursing unit. There’s some yummy chocolate ice cream in the kitchen area. Can I get you some?”

Why not?

“Why not?!” he replied, throwing his hands up in the air. Dad had always been opposed to speaking Yiddish because we were ‘Americans’, but this one time his voice took on the inflection of my grandmother. He seemed to be saying there’s nothing to lose here in saying, yes.

Your Takeaway

Why not! has since become a dear metaphor for me. When people invite me to experience something new I throw up my hands, channeling my inner dad and say, why not! with his same inflection. I’m saying yes to new experiences, new opportunities.

So I say to you, why not open yourself to embracing the affirming way of life.

Why not look for what you appreciate, admire, or adore in the people in your life and tell them!

The way we view the people in our life is a choice. You can focus on the annoying and disappointing things about others or you can look with eyes that see the goodness and pleasure they bring into your life.

Seeing the good is your clay for speaking the good, and experiencing more of the good in your relationships and yourself. 

Why not begin today!