While walking with a friend on the Spring Lake boardwalk, she described the most delightful routine. She said every day in the late afternoon, she crawls into bed and spends an hour reading, listening to podcasts, or doing crossword puzzles.
“That is so cozy and self-nuturing,” I effused. “You have a pleasure routine.”
“I love that Gail! There’s a blog topic you can support others with.
The reason I was so excited by a pleasure routine is that I have become a workaholic! It’s a strange thing for a retired person to say, but I hear myself frequently saying, “I’m working on… or I have to get back to work…. Crazy! I am a lover of routines, and my work routine takes up a big chunk of my day. Maybe a little too big.
Routines as an Anchor
Routines give us a sense of order and well-being. They anchor us in ourselves. I begin my day stretching and meditating followed by a walk. Self-care routines create a feeling of peace and well-being. They can even boost our confidence because we are making good choices. Doing well, as my dad would say.
Then it’s to my writing room I go to do the work I’ve chosen to do, as a retired person. I can sit at my computer from nearly 10-5 doing my new work—writing this blog, coaching, studying writing and coaching, preparing talks, and marketing (my least favorite and biggest learning curve area.) Working on my new careers/hobbies gives my life purpose and meaning.
For 42 years as an educator, I focused on helping students discover their talents, confidence, and a passion for learning. I loved my days with the kids and the honor of making a positive difference in their lives. And now I get to follow my new passion helping adults create deeper fulfillment in every area of their life. The problem is during these pandemic times I’m just working too much!
The definition of work: activity involving mental or physical effort done in order to achieve a purpose or result.
That’s me! I am driven to be productive toward my purpose—all day. I love what I do, but my conversation with my friend signaled to me I am craving a little more down time.
Can you relate? Do you find yourself focused on things that are work to you and don’t indulge often enough in simple things that give you pleasure?
A Pleasure Routine is Like Being on Vacation
my friend, I love reading. I read in dribs and drabs throughout my day—the news on my ipad at breakfast, a personal growth book during lunch, a novel before bed. But it’s short bursts 15 minutes at a shot.
The only time I indulge in escaping pleasurably into a book is on vacation with my sister Lois, at her lake house. We are island-bound without a boat. We spend all afternoon sitting in green Adirondack chairs on her narrow, weathered dock reading, chatting, cooling off in the refreshing water, and reading some more. It feels as relaxing as a day at the spa.
That’s the kind of pleasure routine I’d like to create—a time allotted not to do what’s good for me, not to work on my mission, not to be productive—just to do something for the pure pleasure of it.
Choosing a Pleasure Routine
Thinking of a pleasure routine as a vacation-state-of-mind, I think immediately of two things I’d love to do—dance and extended reading (as you already know.) Dancing gets me in a rhythmic flow and the music lifts my spirits. (It also transports me to my high school dancing-queen self.) Reading for extended time will allow me to escape into another world. Because I’m so cerebral, my pleasure routine will get me out of my thoughts and well, be a pleasure!
I’m committing to indulge in my pleasures four days a week, Monday thru Thursday from 4:00-5:00 PM. Ten minutes dancing, 40-50 minutes reading.
How about you? What would you like to indulge in a number of times a week for pure relaxation and pleasure? Is there something you love to do but can’t seem to find time for? Even 10-15 minutes of time to do something that takes you out of your mind and responsibilities can give you pleasure. We’re worth it, aren’t we?
It’s About Balance
Creating a balanced life of care—for our health and well-being, our home and loved ones, our friendships, and work that gives our life meaning and purpose, brings tremendous peace and empowerment. We don’t always have the luxury to balance our life especially now during the pandemic.
But as you prioritize the use of your time I hope you’ll consider creating a pleasure routine to take better care of you!
The Affirming Way of Life: See the Good, Speak the Good, Spread the Good is available at Amazon. May it support you in living your best most fulfilling life!
